More about
Like footnotes but about the book and some aspects of its creation.
Not too much information since that would take away from the work itself.
I add notes from time to time, thus the reverse order of things, latest on top to earliest below.
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Thanks for taking the time to review the beginning of Ron's story. Your comments are gold and I will continue to consider several of them as I re-write.
Just one thing bothered me, but not as much as it did you, apparently. I refer to the opening paragraphs. Here goes a gloss that I had hoped you would have been able to construct for yourself. I believe a careful reading of the first three paragraphs has all the clues necessary to understand what is happening, or about to happen.
First paragraph is an assertion, like a thesis. One might even call it an hypothesis. I believe this is as simple and direct as one can be: A claim about the nature of men and women in two short, simple sentences.
Second paragraph refers to this thesis (the word even appears here). At the same time, in the second paragraph the speaker questions whether the thesis or the stated assertion considered-as-already-a-conclusion is self-evident ("A given, a-priori-like."). He says it is not. One must be conceited to think so, especially if s/he doesn't ask other people what they think, know, and feel.
Thus the third paragraph where the speaker proposes to take on a personal research project having to do with the thesis, and he announces that the story of the project or pursuit of a question and its answer begins with a look, etc.
As the novel/story progresses, the reader should expect to find not only just this thesis developed but also an antithesis and synthesis. The novel in three parts takes our MC through each of these and concludes, including the relative importance if not the proper order of thinking, knowing, and feeling. Expect there to be encounters with girls/women and his responses to same--he's young, can't decide if he is dealing with girls or more mature creatures. Just as he acknowledges he is a novice in his job, he has also effectively said he is one in matters of male-female relations. Let the job and the research begin.
Clearer?
This is not to say that the first three paragraphs couldn't use work. Still too subtle? One must judge based on how this character reveals himself, a character we already know is unsure of things but seemingly open to new awarenesses based on an apparently reflective nature.
I appreciate knowing your reading resulted in confusion, bewilderment, whatever at this early stage. I will consider this and hopefully the next version will bring readers along more smoothly.
10. _A Penny Drops_ is loosely organized around an argument of the dialectical type. Here it is in executive-summary form, followed by the longer version.
Men are predators, women not so much. Yet women are complicit in the game of the muddle at least men get into. So heterosexual men and women have a mutual assured destiny together--co-dependency, for good or ill. We can only know when it happens. Or life's a crap shoot, or close to that. The answer is to just keep movin'. Act as you mean for it to be.
THESIS
Whether or not the work as a whole pulls off this so-called progress of the soul remains to be noticed in clear outline, by readers and as a result of re-evaluation by yours truly. As the distance grows between the 2017 1.0 version and any later one, a less subjective view along with any necessary creations and corrections can appear on the pages.
I also wanted to create conflict for him by not only his own handsome appearance but also the attractiveness of the women he meets in the course of starting over in a new place. He arrives without history and has to make his own way in a maze of opportunities and self-inflicted dilemmas. He meets his match in three, or four, women, perhaps more types than fully developed characters.
He also has that inner conflict about being good enough, knowing as much as others do, doing the right thing, making the right choices, choosing by not choosing, the default for the conflicted.
There is the play between inside and outside, teacher and student, subject versus object, thinking and feeling . . . and the ways we need to resolve these to get along in life and work and relationships.
3. Names. Some thought went into the names of the characters, an example of which is the word play with Alice and family. As for Ron, he'd be Rex in her court. But also an everyman. Novello would be new man, writing what else? his novella? Google Ron Novello and you will find it is a very common name. Adriana the female form for the Roman wall-builder. And so on.
I can say that Lara as a name for the dark haired "knock-out" came from thinking about Dr. Zhivago, but I place no particular significance on this choice or the association. It just seemed right at the time and I never questioned it, haven't even gone back to the novel to see if by some magic I was calling up something from the unconscious. I leave that to those who might have fun doing so.
Place names? Made up, as were the landscapes so sketchily described. They were not important other than to reveal Alice's character and an out-of-the-way place with good weather where this story could happen. Of course the desert or borderlands did figure into the choice/creation of setting, places where mysterious even epiphanic things happen.
2. Impersonal. The story is not autobiographical. I don't know an Adriana, Alice, Ricky, Captain Foster, etc., in my life. In that the narrator/Ron is apparently a white heterosexual male who experiences the trials of managing sexuality and has difficulties in establishing relationships, while unfortunately being an introvert, or reserved or un-evolved, this I can relate to, for I am surely of the same stock. No experiences/scenes in the book come from my life.
1. Permissions. I could not find whether or not the photo of the two children on the home page is protected. If it is, please forward how I can get permission to use it.
I add notes from time to time, thus the reverse order of things, latest on top to earliest below.
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12. A philosopher, sometime English teacher, noted in the promo piece at the beginning that perhaps instead of un-virgining I should have used the prefix de. Here is my thinking and below that a "defense." for not making the edit. At least not the substitution.
The beauty that would have our hero de-flower her in preparation for "doing it" for real/love with her boyfriend, was to my mind virgining. That is, she was saving herself till later than most for losing(?) her virginity. Thus the verb to virgin and the verbal virgining, a sustained effort to maintain her virginity, or something like that. When Ron came along, he was thought to be the one to undo what she was doing, never to return back to her previous state, which she kept, actively, maintaining. He would serve somewhat like an agent performing a job that had to be done without connection of a greater measure. She didn't envision being de-virgined, going from one state to another as much as to have a deed done, more like an un-doing of something she was doing, stopping her from doing that. Slight difference, a mere nuance perhaps.
Since the term is new or being coined for the special purpose of conveying a tone or connotation, I think it should have been italicized. And in a future edit, will make that typographical change, hoping that my notion of the thing gets some traction.
As to a kind of defense of what I have created by just this one, perhaps jarring piece of diction, consider.
 |
| Un- vs. De- |
Here's the reference.
Un- vs. De-words?, I. (2011). Is there a general rule for the prefixation of "un-" and "de-" to words?. [online] English Language & Usage Stack Exchange. Available at: https://english.stackexchange.com/questions/25941/is-there-a-general-rule-for-the-prefixation-of-un-and-de-to-words [Accessed 18 Nov. 2019].
11. Someone read the first 2000 or so words of this novel and became immediately confused/bewildered by the first paragraphs. An answer to his, or her, predicament appears in note number ten below; however, I did pen this today (28.06.18) in response to the critique the reader provided.
Thanks for taking the time to review the beginning of Ron's story. Your comments are gold and I will continue to consider several of them as I re-write.
Just one thing bothered me, but not as much as it did you, apparently. I refer to the opening paragraphs. Here goes a gloss that I had hoped you would have been able to construct for yourself. I believe a careful reading of the first three paragraphs has all the clues necessary to understand what is happening, or about to happen.
First paragraph is an assertion, like a thesis. One might even call it an hypothesis. I believe this is as simple and direct as one can be: A claim about the nature of men and women in two short, simple sentences.
Second paragraph refers to this thesis (the word even appears here). At the same time, in the second paragraph the speaker questions whether the thesis or the stated assertion considered-as-already-a-conclusion is self-evident ("A given, a-priori-like."). He says it is not. One must be conceited to think so, especially if s/he doesn't ask other people what they think, know, and feel.
Thus the third paragraph where the speaker proposes to take on a personal research project having to do with the thesis, and he announces that the story of the project or pursuit of a question and its answer begins with a look, etc.
As the novel/story progresses, the reader should expect to find not only just this thesis developed but also an antithesis and synthesis. The novel in three parts takes our MC through each of these and concludes, including the relative importance if not the proper order of thinking, knowing, and feeling. Expect there to be encounters with girls/women and his responses to same--he's young, can't decide if he is dealing with girls or more mature creatures. Just as he acknowledges he is a novice in his job, he has also effectively said he is one in matters of male-female relations. Let the job and the research begin.
Clearer?
This is not to say that the first three paragraphs couldn't use work. Still too subtle? One must judge based on how this character reveals himself, a character we already know is unsure of things but seemingly open to new awarenesses based on an apparently reflective nature.
I appreciate knowing your reading resulted in confusion, bewilderment, whatever at this early stage. I will consider this and hopefully the next version will bring readers along more smoothly.
10. _A Penny Drops_ is loosely organized around an argument of the dialectical type. Here it is in executive-summary form, followed by the longer version.
Men are predators, women not so much. Yet women are complicit in the game of the muddle at least men get into. So heterosexual men and women have a mutual assured destiny together--co-dependency, for good or ill. We can only know when it happens. Or life's a crap shoot, or close to that. The answer is to just keep movin'. Act as you mean for it to be.
THESIS
Men are predators, women not so much.
Such a conceit's the mask of the conceited. To think you have the answers is to fool yourself, especially if you never ask another person what they know, think, and feel—in that order. Only then will you find you can proceed along certain lines, or admit the thesis was like some kind of truth that you knew deep down was true for sure somehow before, a-priori-like.
So this is the proposition, just an idea at this point, the beginning, which had some resonance with me. I can't say it was anything of the sort for anyone else, especially girls. I mean women. I had no evidence. I didn't really know based on my experience with people I knew. In fact here in this place where I found myself, I hardly knew anyone. So I began my research just after I starting my new job.ANTITHESIS
I tried to keep it going but she kept putting me off. I was running on empty, and soon after we parted. I had no idea if I would ever see Riana again. Girls, women. My troubles were not just my issues. Women you like a lot also contribute to the muddle we, I mean me, that I get in.
Thus I concluded women are complicit in the game. Knowingly—they should know—they tease, taunt, and test us, and their toy is our drive to mate—call it sex—or their own desire as well alliance with that terrorist they see as responsible for much of macho misdeeds. Testosterone. They attract us. They play with us. They presumably use us. They outlive us. Is that fair?
Consider that an antithesis.SYNTHESIS
It was always about me, wasn't it? What made the difference? Did Captain Foster come to his social action agenda after sexual activity subsided with age? God, he wasn't that old. In his fifties. Just some twenty years ahead of me. Did I have to go through some fire or desert wilderness before I would turn out like him? Did I even want to turn out like him? What would I have to give up if I looked forward and not back? out to others instead of inside to me? And could I avoid going nuts with all of the complexities I saw in life and around me?
No wonder men end up the sickos in co-dependency, where the woman meets nearly all of the man's emotional and self-esteem needs. Ironically it is only a maturing desire born of taming the terrorists within, a move through needs to wants, wants of more of that something that makes the other the so captivating and fascinating creatures that we each are. Heterosexual men and women have a mutual assured destiny together, monogamous but not strictly or necessarily so. Or can we say that two or more people have destinies together for survival and love? We never know till life happens the way we make it.
Call that a synthesis.OR
On the other hand, here was another contradiction. If we, I have this battle going on between the forces of unknown and known biological, physiological, psychological, and who knows what else we are born with or develop as we mature and the voices mental, rational, reasonable, correct, and moral ways of coping and getting along in the face of them, the forces that is, then life doesn't happen the way we make it. It's a crap shoot, or close to that. The ghost in my machine doesn't have the power, the complete and clean power, to have it, whatever, the way I want it. Nor does anyone else, and I'm sure that goes for women . . . the women in my life. No need to be depressed or joyous about this way of things. The only option was to keep moving just like I saw everyone doing around me.This scheme gives the short novel a kind of scaffold, but the real structure that the work should reveal upon close reading is the progress of our hero's constipated soul. From first through third parts, we should see increased growth and awareness, yet not full awareness. He still has, per his love's words in the epilogue, residual hang-ups and blind spots.
Whether or not the work as a whole pulls off this so-called progress of the soul remains to be noticed in clear outline, by readers and as a result of re-evaluation by yours truly. As the distance grows between the 2017 1.0 version and any later one, a less subjective view along with any necessary creations and corrections can appear on the pages.
9. Time has passed since I considered this story complete. In essence it is, although I fiddle with this and that, like the color of the clothing one of the girls wears, in contrast with a colorless and otherwise, intentionally, un-described landscape. Yet, I am still of two minds, at least, about the story as a whole.
more of 9. I tried to build the story with certain philosophical, psychological, and physiological building blocks. But I admit I did so without deep research or awareness of what I was building and what material the blocks were made of. Therefore, there is a hidden layer, a blind spot or spots, where I know there is more; but for purposes of the story to tell they need not--I didn't think--be alluded to or even exposed more such that they could be examined.
The second thing that has come to light is that _A Penny_ is a repetition of another work I did several years ago, and that is a disappointment--why repeat myself except for details? Without realizing it in process I was grappling with the same issues and themes as before.
Therefore, _A Penny_ is not what I intended, a new, creative product. It is but an old and used one, and it refers to me more than something I wanted to treat at arm's length, or even farther, from me. So I have a sense of having failed.
In that there are now at least two readings that show the work is superficial, I am self conscious that perhaps I have created a monstrosity, not on the controversial level of a _Lolita_, but of a WMCP instead, whereas I was only trying to say something simple. Males are visual creatures driven by glandular functions and essences, and they, males, can't help what they are, saved only because society and other factors such as early childhood experiences will either give birth to wildness or constraint until a he decides to engage with the world, especially other people.
So in my mind this story is an imperfect work and incomplete. I may never stop fiddling with it. There are so many things to fiddle with, too. Ron's presumed incompetence. Riana's ethnicity and interests in textiles (feelie things) and objects of use and beauty. Lara's including and transcending her fatherless background. Endless.
I suspect, but in no way am sure, that each reader will not be kind because in their own informed observation, they will see the holes in the argument. I hope that for the present, readers will be critical _and_ understand that the story s/he is listening to in the voice inside one's own being is really that of oneself. We must suspect we all have some flaws, areas of imperfection and for improvement. Humanity is but a complexly layered thing as is reality. Or is that the same thing? No matter, we are all in process--whether we know it or not.
The next story, one that has been in labor overlong, takes up the female side of the equation. I consider the male and female-in-the-male themes done for now. I look forward to how the next iteration comes out.
8. I doubt that in this politically correct and pejorative world, sometimes disguised as enlightened feminism, a book about the male ego and gazing on objects of beauty--women--will get very far. Plus, who has sympathy for a guy struggling with testosterone? In fact, the book may reveal to multi-perspectival elites as just another superior-sounding white guy sounding off.
7. Ron, I have said elsewhere, came to me as a name for a character. It just welled up from somewhere and I used it. I didn't find, in the end, a better name for the characters who got called this name. I mean to say, it turns out that a Ron figures in three pieces of fiction I have worked on. Why? I'm not particularly fond of the name, which perhaps holds the answer to the question.
Ronnie, later Ron, was a bully I knew in grammar school. I never liked him. I was the only one who stood up to him, in my recollection, but I never actually hit or got hit. He easily picked fights where he would dominate and "sock" his opponent in the face or stomach. Came from an Irish family, and the father had a bad reputation. A big deal back then--people to avoid.
I saw the Ronnie who became Ron only once from a distance after moving on to high school. He had bulked up and worked at a welding/blacksmith's shop. Others would tell me about him from time to time, and the stories were never complimentary. He poached on public lands, lied to game wardens, and continued to bully people. These days, some sixty plus years later, I hear he lives in southern Oregon in a trailer, impoverished, alcoholic.
My first Ron character was an abuser and vengeful step-father. He almost died in the book where he first appeared, a book about the supreme values of kindness and accepting others for who we are, essentially good yet flawed human beings.
My second Ron, or Ronald, was a coward and ineffectual, perhaps redeeming himself in the end. I'm referring to this latest, A Penny Drops.) A would-be king, or prince, thus the name (see note elsewhere). He is an object lesson for not hesitating to act even in the face of norms and expectations that keep one from being who they are meant to be.
The first Ron re-appears to die and disinherit his step-daughter, both characters being from the first book above. However she, Johnnie, triumphs, because her sister signs the father's estate over to her. It is a novel about good fortune and overcoming childhood trauma and perceived sins.
Perhaps Ron has haunted me . . . and I have had to dispatch with him.
6. The following quotes from an article by Jules Evans (https://aeon.co/essays/religion-has-no-monopoly-on-transcendent-experience) highlight some of the themes I have presented Ron with.
Alice teases Ron with this possibility. Unfortunately, he succumbs to his funk, a kind of stuckness, or mild depression.
5. The dialectical method of thesis, antithesis, synthesis may be logically unsound, but the device loosely structures the novel and the progress, so-called, of our spiritual seeker. However, his refutation of classic ways of thinking as represented by Locke, Rousseau, and Ryle (Koestler) may even be less well formed. Ron says he defeats empiricism, the noble savage, and mind-body separation, but does he? In addition, the accepted idea of universally experienced emotions and how they arise (especially from whence) have not been treated or referred to. And he makes a big deal of the importance of feelings/emotions. This may be an area for revision and/or additional writing . . . as would be the clothing the women wear that Ron so-imperfectly describes. I refer here to colors and articles of.
4. Themes, or notions. I wanted to write a story about a guy's struggle with sex/testosterone and the social/peer pressures that constrain what he feels he can say, do, and get away with. I also wanted to slowly reveal his progress with the balance that must be achieved, progress made through his becoming transparent to himself. The fact that he objectifies others is a part of the process of achieving that internal sense of balance and greater self awareness.
I thought the magic age for men for having all this play out would be about twenty-seven when they should have mastered the ability to see the consequences of less mature and riskier behavior. Ron is slow to mature, or a late bloomer, which sets the stage for gradual steps forward. It is sometimes a subtle process. . . .
more of 9. I tried to build the story with certain philosophical, psychological, and physiological building blocks. But I admit I did so without deep research or awareness of what I was building and what material the blocks were made of. Therefore, there is a hidden layer, a blind spot or spots, where I know there is more; but for purposes of the story to tell they need not--I didn't think--be alluded to or even exposed more such that they could be examined.
The second thing that has come to light is that _A Penny_ is a repetition of another work I did several years ago, and that is a disappointment--why repeat myself except for details? Without realizing it in process I was grappling with the same issues and themes as before.
Therefore, _A Penny_ is not what I intended, a new, creative product. It is but an old and used one, and it refers to me more than something I wanted to treat at arm's length, or even farther, from me. So I have a sense of having failed.
In that there are now at least two readings that show the work is superficial, I am self conscious that perhaps I have created a monstrosity, not on the controversial level of a _Lolita_, but of a WMCP instead, whereas I was only trying to say something simple. Males are visual creatures driven by glandular functions and essences, and they, males, can't help what they are, saved only because society and other factors such as early childhood experiences will either give birth to wildness or constraint until a he decides to engage with the world, especially other people.
So in my mind this story is an imperfect work and incomplete. I may never stop fiddling with it. There are so many things to fiddle with, too. Ron's presumed incompetence. Riana's ethnicity and interests in textiles (feelie things) and objects of use and beauty. Lara's including and transcending her fatherless background. Endless.
I suspect, but in no way am sure, that each reader will not be kind because in their own informed observation, they will see the holes in the argument. I hope that for the present, readers will be critical _and_ understand that the story s/he is listening to in the voice inside one's own being is really that of oneself. We must suspect we all have some flaws, areas of imperfection and for improvement. Humanity is but a complexly layered thing as is reality. Or is that the same thing? No matter, we are all in process--whether we know it or not.
The next story, one that has been in labor overlong, takes up the female side of the equation. I consider the male and female-in-the-male themes done for now. I look forward to how the next iteration comes out.
8. I doubt that in this politically correct and pejorative world, sometimes disguised as enlightened feminism, a book about the male ego and gazing on objects of beauty--women--will get very far. Plus, who has sympathy for a guy struggling with testosterone? In fact, the book may reveal to multi-perspectival elites as just another superior-sounding white guy sounding off.
7. Ron, I have said elsewhere, came to me as a name for a character. It just welled up from somewhere and I used it. I didn't find, in the end, a better name for the characters who got called this name. I mean to say, it turns out that a Ron figures in three pieces of fiction I have worked on. Why? I'm not particularly fond of the name, which perhaps holds the answer to the question.
Ronnie, later Ron, was a bully I knew in grammar school. I never liked him. I was the only one who stood up to him, in my recollection, but I never actually hit or got hit. He easily picked fights where he would dominate and "sock" his opponent in the face or stomach. Came from an Irish family, and the father had a bad reputation. A big deal back then--people to avoid.
I saw the Ronnie who became Ron only once from a distance after moving on to high school. He had bulked up and worked at a welding/blacksmith's shop. Others would tell me about him from time to time, and the stories were never complimentary. He poached on public lands, lied to game wardens, and continued to bully people. These days, some sixty plus years later, I hear he lives in southern Oregon in a trailer, impoverished, alcoholic.
My first Ron character was an abuser and vengeful step-father. He almost died in the book where he first appeared, a book about the supreme values of kindness and accepting others for who we are, essentially good yet flawed human beings.
My second Ron, or Ronald, was a coward and ineffectual, perhaps redeeming himself in the end. I'm referring to this latest, A Penny Drops.) A would-be king, or prince, thus the name (see note elsewhere). He is an object lesson for not hesitating to act even in the face of norms and expectations that keep one from being who they are meant to be.
The first Ron re-appears to die and disinherit his step-daughter, both characters being from the first book above. However she, Johnnie, triumphs, because her sister signs the father's estate over to her. It is a novel about good fortune and overcoming childhood trauma and perceived sins.
Perhaps Ron has haunted me . . . and I have had to dispatch with him.
6. The following quotes from an article by Jules Evans (https://aeon.co/essays/religion-has-no-monopoly-on-transcendent-experience) highlight some of the themes I have presented Ron with.
We've become a more controlled, regulated and disciplinarian society, in which one's standing as a good citizen relies on one's ability to control one's emotions, be polite, and do one's job. The autonomous self has become our highest ideal, and the idea of surrendering the self is seen as dangerous.Unfortunately, these pressures, Ron calls them, prevent him from who he would be and how, in freedom, he would act. "We have always sought ways to ‘unself', as the writer Iris Murdoch called it, because the ego is an anxious, claustrophobic, lonely and boring place to be stuck".
Alice teases Ron with this possibility. Unfortunately, he succumbs to his funk, a kind of stuckness, or mild depression.
5. The dialectical method of thesis, antithesis, synthesis may be logically unsound, but the device loosely structures the novel and the progress, so-called, of our spiritual seeker. However, his refutation of classic ways of thinking as represented by Locke, Rousseau, and Ryle (Koestler) may even be less well formed. Ron says he defeats empiricism, the noble savage, and mind-body separation, but does he? In addition, the accepted idea of universally experienced emotions and how they arise (especially from whence) have not been treated or referred to. And he makes a big deal of the importance of feelings/emotions. This may be an area for revision and/or additional writing . . . as would be the clothing the women wear that Ron so-imperfectly describes. I refer here to colors and articles of.
4. Themes, or notions. I wanted to write a story about a guy's struggle with sex/testosterone and the social/peer pressures that constrain what he feels he can say, do, and get away with. I also wanted to slowly reveal his progress with the balance that must be achieved, progress made through his becoming transparent to himself. The fact that he objectifies others is a part of the process of achieving that internal sense of balance and greater self awareness.
I thought the magic age for men for having all this play out would be about twenty-seven when they should have mastered the ability to see the consequences of less mature and riskier behavior. Ron is slow to mature, or a late bloomer, which sets the stage for gradual steps forward. It is sometimes a subtle process. . . .
I also wanted to create conflict for him by not only his own handsome appearance but also the attractiveness of the women he meets in the course of starting over in a new place. He arrives without history and has to make his own way in a maze of opportunities and self-inflicted dilemmas. He meets his match in three, or four, women, perhaps more types than fully developed characters.
He also has that inner conflict about being good enough, knowing as much as others do, doing the right thing, making the right choices, choosing by not choosing, the default for the conflicted.
There is the play between inside and outside, teacher and student, subject versus object, thinking and feeling . . . and the ways we need to resolve these to get along in life and work and relationships.
3. Names. Some thought went into the names of the characters, an example of which is the word play with Alice and family. As for Ron, he'd be Rex in her court. But also an everyman. Novello would be new man, writing what else? his novella? Google Ron Novello and you will find it is a very common name. Adriana the female form for the Roman wall-builder. And so on.
I can say that Lara as a name for the dark haired "knock-out" came from thinking about Dr. Zhivago, but I place no particular significance on this choice or the association. It just seemed right at the time and I never questioned it, haven't even gone back to the novel to see if by some magic I was calling up something from the unconscious. I leave that to those who might have fun doing so.
Place names? Made up, as were the landscapes so sketchily described. They were not important other than to reveal Alice's character and an out-of-the-way place with good weather where this story could happen. Of course the desert or borderlands did figure into the choice/creation of setting, places where mysterious even epiphanic things happen.
2. Impersonal. The story is not autobiographical. I don't know an Adriana, Alice, Ricky, Captain Foster, etc., in my life. In that the narrator/Ron is apparently a white heterosexual male who experiences the trials of managing sexuality and has difficulties in establishing relationships, while unfortunately being an introvert, or reserved or un-evolved, this I can relate to, for I am surely of the same stock. No experiences/scenes in the book come from my life.
1. Permissions. I could not find whether or not the photo of the two children on the home page is protected. If it is, please forward how I can get permission to use it.
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